The Tale of a Twin Flame

Writer: J. Riverhill

”Once upon a time, there was a twin flame” is how many stories begin – and so does this one. A surprising number of spiritually oriented people have tried to find their twin flame, their so-called “twin soul”. It has even become a phenomenon of sorts which every now and then rises to the surface. Many spiritual channellers have talked about twin flames in articles and columns.

I came across this topic upon meeting the incarnation of my own twin flame for the first time when I was a bit over twenty years old. (Did you know that, against the common belief, our twin flames can have more than one incarnation, even at the same time?) The experience was confusing. She was a woman over twenty years older than me. Despite the age difference, there was powerful energy and emotion between us. It drove us both mad! She was married and I was single. I was young and completely inexperienced with the opposite sex. I respected her relationship, but the energy drew us both in nonetheless. We meditated together quite often and healed each other. The energy was just ineffable. We rarely talked about it, and when we did, we did so indirectly. We did discuss our past lives – the shared ones too. Years went by, and at some point, we even led a meditation group together. We were always breathless in each other’s company. Finally, after a few years had passed since our first meeting, we discussed the possibility of a relationship, but after further consideration we decided we wouldn’t venture that far. It was a good decision for us both.

Years went by again; I got married and had children. Then, I met a young woman whose energy was absolutely incredible. Based on this experience, I thought she was my twin flame. My guides fell silent. Eventually turned out she was just a soulmate of mine, with whom I had retained a contact as old as ancient galactic wars. I needed that moment of ecstasy to learn more about the matter. Even though this meeting had an impact on my marriage, it was not yet enough to lead us to a divorce.

Already before my first marriage, I had been given the task of finding the right partner as one of my life lessons. It took a long time before I did. Even though meeting my soulmate didn’t lead to anything, I divorced rather soon after meeting her. The divorce had been in progress anyway, at least for a year. My wife was not my twin flame, which however was not what drove us apart but the other problems in our relationship, including the fact that our relationship was of karmic sort. After our divorce, I found myself in turbulence that lasted for a couple of years and which rid me of almost all my joy. That is when I got the opportunity to learn the lessons of the second initiation (you can find out more about initiations in my book “The Golden Book of Humanity” which will soon be available to you in English).

However, my training had just begun, and after this time of turbulence I tried to get back onto my feet. Even though I placed an order for one relationship, one twin flame, one whatnot, I could not find myself a partner. After a couple of years of agonizing over the matter, I realized that I was stuck with the energy of my ex-wife. After all, she was my soulmate with whom I had spent several lives together. ‘Soulmate’ in the spiritual sense of the word means the kind of soul with whom you have spent at least five incarnations in several kinds of relationships. A familiar soul, that is. As soon as I had freed myself energetically of my previous relationship, I met the second incarnation of my twin flame. For five months the energies were intoxicating and life kept shining upon me. This relationship, too, was destined to end, and so we drifted apart due to our life circumstances. I did however feel that I had gotten my life back – this person helped me to understand my uniqueness, and so my lost confidence returned. I became more whole as a man and as a person. But the search for the perfect relationship continued.

After living in Kuopio, eastern Finland for a few years where I had moved for family reasons, I returned to my hometown Jyväskylä, central Finland. I tried to build a new life for myself. Another relationship was found, but only for six months. On some subconscious level I was still after that same feeling of intoxication. I searched and yearned for my twin flame. So the following February, I did find a new, third incarnation of my twin flame. She seemed to me like everything I had ever dreamed of. But our life circumstances threw us apart. This was quite a shock to me. I simply mourned my destiny for many months until something big dawned on me – I had been living in twin flame illusion! I understood that we aren’t necessarily meant to live our human lives with our twin flame unless there is a higher spiritual mission that we are to accomplish with them.

Those who have met the incarnation of their twin flame know what it feels like. Every cell in your body wakes up, and your hormones start to run wild as if it was spring, just a thousand times faster. You might feel as though you’re under each other’s spell. This ecstasy mystifies both parties in a magnificent way. But its purpose proves to be problematic; In 99.9% of the cases where someone meets their twin flame, staying together is not included in the life plans of either party. This usually can be seen in their life circumstances: one or both are already in a relationship, there is a significant age difference, or the other one has already found a relationship filled with love. The variations are manifold.

Life seems to keep our twin flame tenaciously at arm’s length – or, at least, so it feels like.

When something doesn’t go our way, we should try to understand its deeper meaning, to sit down and ask ourselves, “Why?” Why is life keeping me from finding the right kind of relationship right now? Why am I being held back? Or am I holding myself back from reaching happiness? In most cases, the answer to this question is yes. We are preventing ourselves from finding love. This is caused by our living in the world of the lower self and not seeing the truth. So instead of asking the questions above, we should be asking ourselves, “How should I change?” What should I let go of so that I could learn the lessons that the universe is trying to teach me? Why am I not accepting and receiving love into my life?

These questions really made me ponder about my own life. I forced myself to sit in a corner (figuratively), shake myself up, and return to the reality. I hadn’t humbled myself to search the reasons for my own struggling, but now I had to. I placed myself in a corner because I was starting to lose interest in my entire life. My joy was, again, nowhere to be found. When we lose our joy, we need to alert ourselves to look back at the path that we walked and see where we strayed and what we could do to bring our joy back. But first we need to start from the beginning and look at the things that led us there; What is it in ourselves that is standing between us and our happiness? It is our own personal experiences and our way of processing them that is in question here, the place where our past lives and lessons intertwine. Put simply: the things that our souls are to learn during all their incarnations. Over the years I have guided hundreds of people to find their true selves, their inner divinity, and first and foremost, to find themselves as a person. It is the most important thing in walking on the spiritual path as well as in searching for the right kind of relationship.

But even more important is to work out what in our life is real and what is illusion. Are all the things that you have learned during your life, which there should be a whole ton of, true? Is the image you have formed of the world really accurate? It would also be good to find out what you are here to learn as a human being. What are your lessons? What are your weaknesses? In addition to this, it is wise to look at your relationship with your parents and see which of their beliefs you are still carrying with you today. Are they the very same ones that limited their spiritual development? A huge thing to understand as well is that you are unique and wonderful just as you are. You deserve all the love, acceptance, and only the very best. Settling for something less means that you don’t consider yourself worth of all the things that you truly wish to have in your life. Building your self-esteem is important. As my friend Jukka Hirvonsalo once said: “Love yourself to death.” I think this sentence delivers the essential message: You must forgive yourself and love your mistakes and flaws – only then can you fully regain your self-esteem. Appreciate yourself in all matters.

Don’t let yourself live without love. Simply receive!

In my work I hear many similar stories about weak relationships that are built on a karmic foundation almost without exception. All of us have lived in a karmic union that has not been about love but about an unresolved lower relationship with another soul. I, too, lived in a relationship like this. Karma had brought us together. It should be kept in mind, however, that behind karma there always lies a lesson that you are here to learn. Karmic or any other kind of a bond (excluding twin flames) is never born out of nothing but from a reoccurring thought. Our thinking creates a feeling, which we then start to follow. Since our human thinking developed to this point, we have become powerful thinkers. It takes only 2-3 thoughts to create a feeling, and thus the thought materializes into our astral body. Once we adopt this thought pattern, the feeling becomes stronger, and after 40-50 thoughts, the thought manifests itself on the ether plane. For it to reach the physical body we only need to think 200-300 thoughts. In other words, we can materialize our fear, anger, or disease with great speed.

Another thing that affects our relationships is that we often mistakenly vow, promise, or make deals that can hold us back unbeknownst to us for even dozens or hundreds of lives. We are not aware of all the old vows and promises that we’ve made over all our soul’s incarnations and which we still carry in our cell memory. There can be hundreds or even thousands of them. Our soul also carries with it a pile of contracts which we often don’t notice or even are aware of. They can extend over several lives. For example, we may promise to stay with someone for eternity or to help someone regardless of circumstances. These contracts must of course be terminated before we can succeed in our new relationship.

So what exactly is this famous twin flame and what kind of a relationship does it have with its incarnations? The human structure has been secret information for humanity for thousands of years. The Vedas, ancient Indian knowledge texts, shed light on it already a long time ago. In these texts, our inner being is divided into three parts: soul (kama-manas), highest self (monad), and inner divinity (aatma). I call this inner divinity a partially theosophical name of ‘Inner Christ’. Our inner divinity sends out many monads, highest selves, into the world (twelve in total). Each of the highest selves then sends out souls to be born as humans on Earth, the maximum of simultaneously born souls being four.

Our Inner Christ divided itself in half in the 8th dimension: feminine and masculine. These two halves are what I call ‘twin flame’. When we meet the incarnation of our other half here on Earth, we meet the incarnation of our twin flame. Once we understand the wideness and depth of our true self, we can realize that during our lifetime we may meet several incarnations of our twin flame.

Although I previously stated that we usually don’t live together with our twin flame, it is not impossible. Ever since my twenties I lived in the illusion of never being able to live my life with anybody else except my twin flame, and that is what led me away from reality. It was a veil of illusion which made an excellent lesson for me – I noticed that my whole life was revolving around this issue and that it prevented me from living my life to the fullest. This feeling gathered around it a cluster of thoughts that steered my actions. In other words, I wasn’t free, but shackled by my obsession.

So if you have been in a similar situation or are still looking for the One to share your life with, based on my experiences, I can tell you this: do not get fixated on a particular person, thought, or image of a perfect relationship, but let everyone and everything love you. Let yourself receive love, acceptance, care, tenderness, touch, being present, listening, and everything good from everyone without inhibitions. Turn your symbolic receiver up as high as you can. Do not set limits for your receiving love, but receive and accept help in everything, including your search for the right partner. Let angels help you in this – they will find the right person in your life, and you can get what you need. So let them know that you are in need of help! But do not expect anything, for expectations will only keep you waiting.

Once I let go of my twin flame illusion, about a week went by and I travelled far up north to give lectures at a summer event. As I was getting ready to give my lecture, just before the big moment another car full of listeners arrived. Little did I know, there was a beautiful young woman amongst them. The moment was magical: Once again, I found an incarnation of my twin flame, fourth of its kind! This incarnation was different from others as this time we shared a life purpose. Upon letting go of the false image of relationships I had had in my mind for years, I finally found the perfect match.

Before you start looking for a relationship for yourself, I suggest you get to know yourself and grow yourself as a person, which means that you face the things that you are here to learn as a human being. In my consultations, I will help you to see through your veil of illusion and to remove the obstacles you have set for yourself should you not be able to do this alone. Give yourself the permission to become free of illusions and set yourself free to live your life to the fullest. Love yourself so much that you want to find your true self. Appreciate yourself so much that you are ready to receive all the good things in your life.

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